The Missing Piece in Therapy: When Talking Isn’t Enough
One of my recent joys has been watching my 14-month-old niece dance. The moment she hears a song she loves, her shoulders and hips start wiggling, her hands wave in delight. Sometimes, she smiles; other times, she’s straight-faced, as if to say, “This is just what my body does.” She’s at a precious age where she’s not concerned with how she looks—she simply follows her body’s organic impulses.
This is embodiment. Being fully in our bodies is our birthright.
But for many of us, especially those with trauma, this connection is disrupted. Trauma overwhelms the nervous system, and to cope, we disconnect from our bodies. As a somatic therapist in NYC, I see this often—especially among Black women and adult children of immigrants. My clients are articulate and insightful, yet struggle to feel their emotions in their bodies.
The Limits of Talk Therapy
Therapy is becoming more normalized, and I love that mental health is being recognized as just as important as physical health. But what’s most available is talk therapy—often psychodynamic or Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT). These approaches are based on the idea that when you know better, you do better. They help clients gain self-awareness, understand unconscious patterns, and reframe thoughts. The therapeutic relationship itself can also be deeply healing.
And yet, I often hear from clients: “I understand why I am the way I am, but I don’t know how to change how I show up in the world.”
Because the truth is, even if you know better, you may still be unable to do better. I know this firsthand.
My Journey from Talk Therapy to Somatic Healing
My first experience with therapy was post-grad school, in a high-stress job. I had a great Black woman therapist, and together, we explored my family history, my stressors, my unconscious patterns. But over time, I realized I was just talking in circles—gaining insight but not experiencing deep change. I’d leave my therapist’s office feeling relieved, only to be hijacked by the same emotional rollercoaster the next day.
When I moved to NYC, I knew I needed something different. I wasn’t interested in more cognitive insight; I needed to get out of my head. That’s when a friend introduced me to somatic therapy.
What Is Somatic Therapy?
Somatic therapy works from the understanding that trauma isn’t just in our minds—it’s stored in our bodies. To heal, we must bring the body into the conversation. While talking is part of the process, the focus is on bodily sensations—the language of the body.
This is why somatic therapy is essential for trauma healing. I’ve worked with countless clients who suffered for years simply because they didn’t know there were alternatives to talk therapy. Their therapists weren’t ill-intentioned, but many lacked the trauma training to recognize what was happening in the therapy room.
In some cases, talk therapy can even perpetuate defenses. If you use intellect as a defense, endless talking allows you to bypass the deeper emotional work. It keeps you in your head, skimming past the body’s wisdom—the very place where healing happens.
Is Somatic Therapy Right for You?
If you’ve tried therapy before but still feel stuck, here’s how to know if somatic therapy might be a good fit:
You want to heal holistically. You recognize that while you’ve addressed your thoughts and beliefs, there’s a deeper layer—the wisdom of your body. That tightness in your chest when you see your boss’s email, the pit in your stomach during conflict, the quickened heartbeat when you feel attraction—these sensations mean something, and you want help understanding and integrating them.
You’re a BIPOC, LGBTQIA+, woman/femme reclaiming your power. Trauma often disconnects us from our bodies—it can feel unsafe to be home in ourselves. And for those with marginalized identities, simply existing in a society where oppression is woven into its structures can create a profound disconnection from the body. The weight of navigating these realities—alongside personal experiences of trauma—reinforces this divide. Somatic therapy is a way to reclaim your relationship with your body, to come home to yourself.
You’ve achieved success—but still feel disconnected from yourself. On paper, your life looks great. Your career is thriving, finances are stable, yet something still feels off. It’s like you’re watching your life unfold instead of living it. You want to reconnect with yourself and take back the driver’s seat of your life.
You struggle with emotional regulation. Your emotions often feel overwhelming, and instead of fully feeling them, you disconnect from your body altogether. In moments of stress, you might find yourself reacting with intensity—perhaps a burst of anger or frustration when something feels threatening, or maybe you try to control the situation in an effort to regain safety. On the other hand, you might freeze, shutting down completely and feeling unable to move or respond. Somatic therapy offers a pathway to not only feel your emotions but to integrate them, leading to more regulated responses and a greater sense of inner peace and control.
Ready for Deeper Healing?
If this resonates, somatic therapy may be the missing piece. I offer Somatic EMDR Intensives-a weekend therapy bootcamp and a powerful way to work through trauma more efficiently than traditional weekly therapy. These intensives are ideal if you don’t have space for ongoing sessions but need focused, deep healing. They can stand alone or complement talk therapy.
Your body holds the key to your healing. Let’s unlock it together.
Reach out today to learn more.
